It’s the growing season for us gardeners. I have little plants making their way in the garden, in my conservatory, and I do my best to nurture them, so they can grow strong and healthy. I water them, feed them, and check on them regularly. If they’re not doing very well, I try to find a way to help them recover themselves. My reward will be some lovely vegetables to eat, and some beautiful flowers filling my garden with scent and colour.
What has this to do with friendship? Well, it’s made me think about how we need to nurture our friendships as well, if we want the benefits of those strong, healthy relationships.
I am very lucky: I have a number of really good friends. They are valuable to me, and have been a saving grace for me over the last year or so particularly. And I don’t take them for granted.
Nurturing friendships means checking in regularly – that phone call to say how are you doing when they cross your mind. It means accepting and taking notice if friends are going through a rough patch, and offering the sympathy that makes them feel heard. It means encouraging the change of perspective that shared laughter can bring. It means celebrating with them when things go well for them.
Real friendships also need honesty about our ups and downs. If I don’t ever admit to bad moods, being upset, or just ‘off’ for no good reason, nor can my friends with me. If I don’t say how I’m over the moon about something daft like finishing a hard jigsaw, they can’t tell me about the perfect loaf of bread they made and how chuffed they are.
And when you know that you can be just however you are that day with a friend, it allows us to relax into the moment, allow bad moods to pass, enjoy the good moods, and look forward to each other’s company no matter what.
My friends are fab – thank you! And I hope I am a good friend most of the time, but there is always more we can do to nurture those relationships. It’s worth it, the rewards are great.
So, who’s crossing your mind as you read this? Give them a call, ask them how they’re doing, bring a little extra sunshine into their life today – they deserve it for being a friend.